How Do You  Feel Better?

The joy in feeling better.

It is challenging to be happy when your mind is filled with negative clutter.

Most of us would agree that what we all want most in our lives is happiness.

We talk about happiness as something that happens or comes upon us. However, most of my clients who visit the #mindsetcoachwebsite or come to me say, “It wasn’t a happy day.” “I had an unhappy childhood.” or “I just don’t have a happy life at all.”

Let’s dial this back and remind ourselves that such emotions, including happiness, are not something that comes from outside of us. If we look at the basics and talk about what it exactly means to be happy, we would see that it is entirely within our control. Happiness is not determined by who we get married to or who we didn’t get to marry. Neither it is determined by how many kids we had nor, for that matter, didn’t have. Nor is it resolved by the car we drive or the house we live in.

All emotions, including happiness, are created in our minds. Instagram, Facebook, and

Television wants you to believe that your feelings are made outside of us by a thing we purchase. If we buy a specific car or wear a particular brand of clothing,

then we will be happy.

Recently our children referred to the new “sliders” shoes as the must-have new fashion accessory. I reminded them of last year’s ‘must haves,’ which were Adidas All-stars; and the year before, it was the

Converse Boots. In that moment of 15-minute lecture, I shared my beliefs as a #lifecoach and a  rebellion against commercialism. It is a strong belief of mine NOT to follow crazes such as collectibles from Woolworths, Coles or McDonalds. Unfortunately, many of us are brainwashed by this idea and believe we must chase something external to change how we feel.

Advertising relies on your belief, which is valid for my weight-loss clients. Late-night TV advertising is selling the secret to happiness, which lies in getting thin. All you have to do is buy “these diet food products’ and “these exercise machines,’ and you will have a six-pack which equals happiness. But, on the other hand, you will soon look like an 18-year-old girl model with no children if you go for “try now” and “pay later” schemes. Soon you will knock yourself up and call yourself stupid, and I did it too.

We are all hoping there is an easy answer.

Even when I lost weight and went on crazy diets when I was younger, I never found the secret to happiness that was supposed to accompany the feeling of losing weight. I have since learned that it is not valid. As #lifecoach, I have many slender clients who are still searching for happiness. I believe the times in my life I had my “best body” were my most unhappy years.

Think about what you “think” you need or want to be happy. Will your goal bring you rainbows and butterflies if you achieve it? Will you obtain the control that you are after?

What I want to teach you from my #mindsetcoachwebsite and as #lifecoach is that you understand the only reason why any of us want anything is because of how we believe we will feel in attaining it.

Whatever you want in your life, it is because you think you will feel better for having it. Isn’t it right? The truth?

So let me remind you again –

Our thoughts create our feelings. Some sentences keep repeating in our heads.

Our feelings create our actions.

Our actions create our results.

Only massive action produces the results we want.

Let me remind you of the difference between passive and massive action. What you are learning by reading this blog is a passive action. You’re not creating any results in your life right now. Massive action produces results by implementing what you have learned into your life.

So how do you do this? Where do you start? Start by drip-feeding your brain daily with positivity from inspirational podcasts and audiobooks. Remove the negative choices that television and music give and bleed your mind.

Good feelings create good actions, which produce good results. Look at the

results in your life and ask yourself, “What were the feelings that created these results?

What actions or non-actions created these results in my life?’

All the answers to happiness are right there inside you. Sometimes we need a little assistance in changing the channel.

Happiness is an inside job.

See you on the inside!

Coach Raylee